Suck it, Lindsey Graham [Rated PG]

For "profanity guaranteed." Just so you're all warned.

I was just headed out the door but made the mistake of checking Hugh Hewitt's site and seeing a quote from newly minted RINO Senator Lindsey Graham that I just couldn't resist feeding through my rhetorical wood-chipper.

Lindsey Graham, on CNN's Inside Politics today:

"There are kids in Iraq today and Afghanistan who don't have to be there. They volunteered to serve their nation and some of them are getting killed and some of them are getting injured and they are all subject to getting shot at. They did something they didn't have to do for the good of the country. I didn't have to change my vote, but I changed my vote knowing that if we don't try and cool off here, we're going to destroy the Senate and ruin the judiciary."

Shut up, you bootlicking pantywaist. How dare you - How f'ing dare you - hide your analingus of your asshole buddy "Sailor" McCain behind the the men and women on the front lines of the GWOT who are battling the jihadi savages on our behalf. You're a colonel in the goddamned reserves, for heaven's sake. What the hell is the matter with you?

As for that for which you're using our troops as involuntary props, it's the Democrats who heated things up in the Senate with their unconstitutional filibusters, you lamebrained cretin. They're the ones trying to destroy the Senate and ruin the Judiciary by turning it into an irremovable left-wing oligarchy that will leave the elective branches to wither into atrophied civic appendages. You're a Republican, numbnut - or at least you were. The voters gave you people the majority on the explicit grounds that you put a stop to what the Democrats are doing. Nowhere did I see any Republican campaign last fall on the platform of going into a back room, drop his/her drawers, and allow seven jackasses led by a senile night rider have carnal knowledge of their "bipartisan" nether regions.

"And if your goal is for me to hate people, and that's the test, I'm never going to do that. I don't hate my Democratic colleagues, I disagree with them over this issue.

Nobody asked you to hate them - though they hate you with a passion, even as they're taking turns boning you up the ass. Stop the feeble attempt at emotional red herrings. Stop also the blatant fiction that you disagree with them over this issue. You actually manage to give "Stockholm Syndrome" a bad name, and that's really saying something.

"We got a chance to start over and to every conservative group out there, these judges are going to get better treatment, we're going to have a chance to put a conservative on the Supreme Court and if the deal comes undone, I've retained my right to exercise the nuclear option in the future. No one has given up anything other than chance to start over."

If some of your Republican colleagues are to be believed, your caucus had the votes to break the filibuster once and for all. That means you didn't f'ing need to "start over," because you were already in position to win. That you voluntarily threw that triumph away for thirty shekels of silver and three magic beans proves that you're not interested in winning in any sense other than the delusional notion that this debacle will somehow enhance Senator McQueeg's chances of mutinying his way to the White House. And it damn sure proves that you don't have the balls to exercise the "nuclear" option, in the future or any other time, because those two withered objects are already in Harry Reid's trophy case.

Take my advice, Graham Cracker - get a new rafter of campaign pics taken of yourself. You need a helluva lot larger airbrush to cover up your lobotomy scars.