Meanwhile, back at the war...

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"Iran added a 'strategic missile' to its military arsenal after a successful test, and the defense minister said Saturday his country was ready to confront any external threat."

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"Syria's 'President' Bashir al-Asad is in secret negotiations with Iran to secure a safe haven for a group of Iraqi nuclear scientists who were sent to Damascus before last year's war to overthrow Saddam Hussein.

"Western intelligence officials believe that President Asad is desperate to get the Iraqi scientists out of his country before their presence prompts America to target Syria as part of the war on terrorism."

Iraqi nuclear scientists were sent to ~!#$ing Syria before Operation Iraqi Freedom? Golly gee, who knew? Goodness gracious, I just don't know what to make of that.

Gee whiz, you don't think maybe they rode to %^&*ing Damascus atop the $%^&ing trucks carrying Saddam's ^%$#ing WMD arsenal, do you?

Nah, can't be. These people don't exist, just like Saddam's WMD. Michael Moore said so.

Besides, we don't dare try to stop Syria's and Iran's WMD programs (which don't exist, either) like we did Iraq's (which didn't exist), or we'll get nuked (with warheads that don't exist). Ted Kennedy said so.

And Joe Lockhart thinks George Bush lives in a fantasy world?

Cripes, they need to pass a breathalizer around that fever swamp like it was a bong.

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