Plumbing the Depths

One fine summer's day Paul Mirengoff, Scott Johnson, John Hinderaker, and Nick Coleman were passing the time down by the Mississippi River waterfront in downtown Minneapolis. Well, okay, the Powerline trio was there to enjoy a rare day off, and Coleman was there to try and retrieve all his hatchets so he could sell them on Ebay, but I digress.

The Deacon, feeling the urge to relieve himself, and after a cursory look finding nobody else in the immediate vicinity, and really not giving a damn what Coleman might think, decided to be a little daring and whipped it out to go in the river. Noticing their colleague's actions, Big Trunk and Hindrocket decided to join him.

Coleman, afflicted with what the blogosphere had long since recognized was one of the worst cases of penis envy the world had every seen, was determined not to be so visceraly, to say nothing of metaphorically, out-done, and stepped right up beside them.

After ten or so seconds had passed, Deacon quipped, "Boy, this water is cold!" Next to him, Big Trunk added, "Yeah, and deep, too!" Not to be outdone himself, Hindrocket cracked, "And the bottom is as muddy as the old song says!"

Looking furtively at them, Coleman muttered, "What water....?"