Making The Going A Little Less Tough

Who knew that "Madris Gras" meant, "Don't sweat holding it" in French? Ken Ortmann, that's who:

Ken Ortmann, an alderman who owns a local [St. Louis] tavern wants to lower the penalties for public urination before the February 25 Mardi Gras Parade.

Aha! He has a conflict of interest! Did Jack Abramoff represent that Public Urination Lobby (PUL) as well? Quick, call the Justice Department!

Ortmann said his bill would allow police to issue different citations for public urinators who try to be discreet than they might for those who are more open about it.

"There's a difference between going in the middle of the street, in front of God and country, and somebody who is behind a Dumpster," Ortmann said.

Not according to local residents, some of whom turn on their sprinkers to avoid having their lawns "moistened" the other way.

You could even say that they're getting all pissy about the Ortmann bill. But rest assured I certainly won't....