How Kids Are Born Today

A little boy goes to his father and asks "Daddy, how was I born?" The father answers: "Well son, I guess one day you will need to find out anyway!"

Your Mom and I first got together in a chat room on Yahoo. Then I set up a date via e-mail with your Mom and we met at a cyber-cafe. We sneaked into a secluded room, where your mother agreed to a download from my hard drive. As soon as I was ready to upload, we discovered that neither one of us had used a firewall, and since it was too late to hit the delete button, nine months later a little Pop-Up appeared that said....

[Oh, you're kidding. This can't be serious...You really want me to say this? C'mon, this is the lamest...I can't say this. I won't say this. It's dumb. Forget it, I'm....What? If I don't, I'll be taking all these cans, boxing 'em and shipping 'em? You'll demote me to the f'ing warehouse? You can't...you can? It says so in my contract? In the fine print? But I never read anything that said...Trust you, it's there? How can I trust you if you want me to utter embarrassingly unfunny punchlines like...I can take it up with the legal department or the clerk at the unempoyment line? Any questions? Um...no, I guess not. *AHEM*]

....You've got male.

[Whaddaya mean you want another take? I couldn't help it; I always grit my teeth when you make me spew trite, cutsey-pie drivel like that....]